I Awoke This Morning

I awoke this morning, thinking about how warm and comfortable I was under my quilt, the one my Mom and her quilting friends have made for me in a sailing motif, all with varied panels showing boats and the ocean in so many shades of beautiful blue. As I lay there I found myself wishing that there was someone in my life who would bring me toast and coffee while I lie abed, not because I deserve it or have earned it, but simply because that person felt I was special enough to care about and to care for, special enough that they would do something nice for me for no reason other than they wanted to. It's been a very long time since I have had a person like that in my life, someone who was nice to me just because they cared, someone who wanted to out of love for me, without expectation or return.

I awoke this morning, thinking about yeast infections. Last night while at Trivia, someone spilled a glass of beer and it all ended up in my lap. I was in the line of fire and unable to move as the flood of gold flowed across the table and on to me. My crotch and upper legs were completely soaked in beer. I had to transfer to another chair while my wheelchair dried. My pants were still wet when I got home. The problem is that, with my atrophied upper leg muscles folding into one another, my groin does not dry out all that well. It is almost constantly moist from sweat, and beer has yeast in it. On the plus side, someone else spilled the beer. It would appear that not all clumsiness is ALS related.

I awoke this morning, thinking it was Thursday. This happens at times. I lose my sense of calendar and am compelled to look at the rhythm of my life for cues as to what day it is. It took a few minutes for me to remember that last night was Trivia Night and that happens on Tuesday so this must be Wednesday. It sounds odd to completely lose a day like that; I know it happens to other people too. We all become disoriented in our lives now and again.

I awoke this morning. Perhaps this is the most important thing of all. I awoke this morning. I get to live another day, watch the birds fly in and out of the tree in front of my window, hear the sound of people on the streets below, smell the coffee beside me, do my laundry, work on my work. I awoke this morning.